KPOP<3

why do i have dis feeling ? it's not loneliness , nor issit scaredness , neither issit heartache . the constent tugging at my heart , whenever i'm enjoying myself . U will always pop up into my mind , taunting me , threatening me , laughing at me , never once letting me enjoy myself . always making me worry over U . trapped and helpless , i feel like breaking down , telling myself dont worry , dat it's all over , but no , i cant .. can i ? of coz i cant . if i did dat , i would let everyone down and den , it wouldnt be the first time anymore . mum would be sad , dad would be sad , everybody would be sad and me ? i'll be overwhelmed by guilt . guilt of why i didnt do the right thing earlier . guilt of why i let them down again . guilt of why i didnt listen to U . life sucks doesnt it ? yea .. life truely sucks . i wish U didnt come into my life before . others find u loveable but not to me . U're the one i hate most in the world . why did i even invite U into my life in the first place ? all i did was invite more trouble into my alr troublesome life . and now u want to take my happiness away , like taking away my feedom wasnt enough . dont u think it's time to stop ? or do u want to torment me until i die ?

oh god , help me . plz . i'm begging u .